Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Mother of Cramps and Labor Pain and All Feminine Crap

I'm taking a new approach to my suffering. The pain is worse, it's freaking my kids out and they keep wanting to call 911. When I can't walk or fix them lunch, it's time to blame someone. I've decided that if Eve wasn't such a prideful and stupid woman, this might not even be occurring right now. Yes, I know some other woman would have come along and screwed up eventually but I'm using this to get through today. I am in the writhing and gnashing stage of feminine pain and it's officially all her fault. She sucks. Thankfully, Christ came, our Blessed Mother did damage control or this might be even worse. It's still Eve's fault and she will go down in history as the Mother of Cramps and Labor Pain and All Feminine Crap. Thanks a lot, you stupid woman.

I'm not bitter or anything today. It's a coping skill. Seriously.


Sew Infertile said...

You are so funny! Pain will do that to you, I completely understand! Yes you are right!

I am sorry for my ignorance but why are you still in pain? I hope I didn't offend you in asking that question. I really am asking with sincerity.

Sew Infertile said...

Okay, I understand now!! I read your post a few days ago. Gotcha!

a thorn in the pew said...

I have had pain with my miscarriage in the past but not like this. Up until this last weekend, my body still thought it was pregnant. My hcg was so insanely high with the twins that it took a long time for my body to return to normal. So now that my body thinks it is "normal" again, it is shedding the uterine lining and what is left from the pregnancy. I knew I was in trouble when the OB seemed surprised there wasn't more bleeding 2 weeks ago. He is also careful not to leave excess scar tissue with the D&C knowing we hope to have more children(some way, by miracle). As a result, this is like a pseudo period/birth/miscarriage and unlike my previous experience. No offense taken. I know I am not the first to go through this. Most of my circle of family and friends don't have any experience in this matter. I don't really have anything to compare it to. Sigh.

Cathy said...


(Yeah, but remember, Eve is a Saint of Heaven... There's hope for all of us, I suppose.)

Praying for you.

Dymphna said...

Many a time I've wondered Eve, why the heck did you listen to a seductive snake? What were you thinking, mother?

Ask your doctor for the stuff I had. I think it's an oxycotin blend.

Laura The Crazy Mama said...

Oh man, I gotta show my daughter this one when she's having one of "those" days. It made me chuckle! I find myself cursing that woman a LOT. It kinda feels good. Is that bad?